The Big Fat Marketing Blog

What can we at Multichannel Merchant tell from the early Black Friday, Thanksgiving Weekend and Cyber Monday sales figures that have come across our desks?

Not a lot, really. But we can draw to a conclusion that marketers don’t want us to report: 100% of surveys completed, were taken by people who were surveyed. Some “results” that have been reported to us are like the Chewbacca Defense. And others? Yes, some of them do make sense. more

Sen. Tom Carper, a Democrat from Delaware, knows the U.S. Postal Service is in trouble and he wants to fix it. more

Five hundred and sixty-three: That’s how many Christmas-related marketing emails I received between Monday, Nov. 22, and Sunday, Nov. 28. And because I’m so darn dedicated (or obsessive, or crazy—take your pick), I read through every single one of them to sort out the trends.

So what trends am I seeing, you ask?

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Cyber Monday started with a bang with the announcement that Pornaments.com is open for business. The website sells what parent company The Dirty Flirty Novelty Co. describes as “a fun and flirty collection of provocative holiday ornaments.”

(For the record, Urban Dictionary defines pornaments as “pornographic Christmas tree ornaments depicting beloved seasonal figures in sexual positions,” which is not to be confused with a tournament that consists of pornographic events. Got that?) more

That’s not my mother-in-law, by the way. That’s just an image I swiped from one of those “we’ll save your credit” ads.

My 70-something mother-in-law was complaining about Kmart being open on Thanksgiving Day and said she’ll never buy from them again. I told her to get used to it, because merchants had started running Thanksgiving Day specials online as well. And if the competition is going to be open online on Thanksgiving, your business may want to follow suit.

But then I got a minor shock: She said she shops online. Though she seemed to be a little skeptical about online tactics, she seemed to somewhat get a hang of it. more

If you have Comcast as your Internet Service Provider, you either can’t read this, or this post is already outdated. Customers from Boston to Washington, DC suffered from an Internet outage Sunday night, and some customers are still feeling the effects this morning… Cyber Monday.

If you’re a Comcast customer, you’re probably downright pissed. If you’re a merchant… I’m sure you’re also downright pissed. more